JulietJoan in Verbinding

De term "in verbinding" komt de laatste tijd steeds voorbij. Het is bijna een mode-uitdrukking geworden en ik ga erop "aan". Dat is patsboem gebeurd.

Hoewel ik het nieuws op radio of tv nauwelijks volg, kan ik er niet aan voorbij, dat, in elk geval in Nederland, allerlei instanties, instellingen en clubs proberen mensen met elkaar te verbinden.

Nederland staat op dit moment in de tijd in het teken van de Week Tegen Eenzaamheid. Ik vind het nogal wat hoor, dat vanuit de overheid dit een thema is.

Wij zijn zover van elkaar afgedreven, dat iets wat tijden geleden en met name in kleine gemeenschappen, iets natuurlijks was, bijna is verdwenen en nu opnieuw moet worden aangeleerd.

Ik ben heel graag op mezelf. Toch werd ik geraakt toen in de straat waarin ik woon een initiatief is opgestart met elkaar in verbinding te gaan. Mijn eerste gedachte was "hoe dan! Ik ben gesteld op mijn privacy! Ik groet sowieso iedereen! Wat willen jullie van me!"

Toen ik besloot toch maar naar een bijeenkomst te gaan waar het een en ander zou worden uitgelegd, een aanpak zou worden voorgesteld, begon ik warm te lopen voor het idee.

Toevallig (wat is toeval!!) kreeg ik van iemand ook nog een linkje toegestuurd Rondje zachtheid, waar ik na lezing een variant op bedacht heb en gedeeld heb met de mensen uit mijn straat. Wie verzint nou zo'n leuke, fijne, voor mij aansprekende naam. De auteur van Rondje Zachtheid en ik quote "werd geïnspireerd door Sigrid Kaag, die in een uitzending van Collegetour op 28 mei 2023, werd geconfronteerd met de angst en het verdriet van haar dochters. De vraag kwam op of we niet iets kunnen doen aan de toenemende hardheid en de lelijkheid in de wereld, op de social media, in de kranten, op straat.

Omdat ik zo graag wil "begrijpen" hoe het kan dat "Rondje Zachtheid" zich als een milde regenbui aan het verspreiden is ben ik gaan lezen in Liefde 2.0 van Barbara Fredrickson, een van de grondleggers van de positieve psychologie.

Zachtheid is een uitingsvorm van liefde. En liefde herdefinieert zij als "een micromoment van verbondenheid" en als een van onze krachtigste emoties. Want wat gebeurt er tijdens zo'n rondje zachtheid? Je wandelt met elkaar, je hebt waarachtig contact, je hebt soms ook fysiek contact en .. oogcontact! Of in die glimlach. Bladzijden vol schrijft Barbara hierover. En ik voel bij elke bladzijde: Ja! Het klopt. We ervaren het elke keer als we ons "rondje zachtheid" wandelen."

Door persoonlijke omstandigheden heb ik de rondjes zachtheid moeten onderbreken, maar ik hoop ze binnenkort weer op te kunnen pakken.

Ik wens je veel zachtheid

JulietJoan

Voeten-Leed

Alweer gearresteerd in mijn bezigheden. Of zal ik maar gewoon zeggen .. vette pech. 

Afgelopen donderdag struikelde ik (ongehaast) over een mini overgang tussen een stoep en een fietspad. Je kent ze vast wel, roodgekleurde fietspaden naast de straat, naast de stoep-met-parkeermogelijkheid-voor-bezoekers-van-de aangrenzende-winkels. In dit geval een overgang van maximaal 1 centimeter en door de hele lay-out van de weg niet duidelijk zichtbaar. 

 

Enfin, ik verklaar dit stukje Schieweg in Delft behoorlijk gevaarlijk voor fietsers en voetgangers.

Gelukkig is de schade, waarschijnlijk omdat ik stevige schoenen droeg, beperkt tot een gekneusde voet (niets gebroken en ik ben niet gevallen!!) en die is zich ook al aan het herstellen.

 

Een beetje drama is mij niet vreemd, vandaar de volgende woorden:

Heel-heid

Soms verandert het leven
van het ene op het andere moment.
Wat vanzelf sprak, vraagt nu aandacht.
Wat gewoon was, wordt bijzonder.

Toch, in alles wat anders werd,
blijft er zoveel dat krachtig is:
mijn gedachten die helder blijven,
mijn hart dat voelt en weet.

Ik mag nog steeds genieten
van het licht door het raam,
van een glimlach, een gesprek,
van muziek die raakt
en stilte die heelt.

Niet alles hoeft perfect te zijn
om heel te mogen voelen.
Er schuilt een diepe schoonheid
in wie ik ben ..
precies zoals ik ben.

Ik ben compleet,
op mijn eigen wijze.
Heel,
in lichaam én in ziel.

 

Lieve groet,

Juliet Joan

Beter-voelen-in-je-lijf (jeugdtrauma loslaten)

Ruim een jaar geleden heb ik "kennis"gemaakt met de cursussen van Jan Bommerez. 

Omdat ik een eeuwige onderzoekster ben, ben ik de uitdaging aangegaan te onderzoeken hoe het staat met mijn persoonlijk jeugdtrauma. Wat een reis! 

De cursus Jeugdtrauma bestaat uit 52 lessen, die je in je eigen tempo kan bestuderen/volgen/doorleven.Toen ik na een jaar merkte, dat ik nog niet verder was gekomen dan les 8, besloot ik (moedig) toch verder te gaan.

Jan benadrukt continu, dat je je lijf moet laten bepalen wanneer verder te gaan, wanneer het tijd is om een nieuwe les te omarmen en die eerste lessen hebben mij op mijn grondvesten doen trillen. Inmiddels ben ik een stukje verder, maar steeds grijp ik terug naar die eerste oefeningen onder het motto "ik heb geen haast".

Het is bijzonder en heel erg de moeite waard om patronen die je leven belemmerend beheersen, op fysiek niveau te voelen oplossen. Niets of niemand wordt iets verweten, geen gegraaf in mijn zielenleven, bevroren energie (dat is een term die in mijn leven is geïntroduceerd door deze cursus) lost op en ik voel me zo veel vrijer worden.

Conclusie: ik heb mezelf een cadeau gegeven en na een jaar valt er nog zoveel uit te pakken en te begrijpen over wie ik ben, waar ik sta en waar ik naar toe ga. Haast heb ik niet. Ik voel een continue verwondering en liefde en heel veel emotie en groei.

Lieve groet,

Juliet Joan

Experimenteren op de iPad - het werd een korte boekbespreking

Een beetje aan het experimenteren op de iPad.

Ik ben een behoorlijke digibeet en kan momenteel niets publiceren via mijn computer. (Inmiddels is het gelukt!!) Schrijven en delen via de iPad is een beetje anders, wel makkelijk eigenlijk. Helaas ben ik er nog niet uit hoe ik gezellige plaatjes kan delen, maar dat ga ik uitvinden. (Gelukt!!)

Ik ben heel veel aan het lezen en schrijven. Een heel mooi boek, dat ik net uit heb is De Amandelboom geschreven door Michelle Coheen Corasanti. Mooi, in termen van een prachtige levendige schrijftrant. Het onderwerp is erg intens. De strijd tussen Joden en Palestijnen of kan ik misschien beter schrijven Palestijnen en Joden? Het is ook een verhaal van vriendschap en sterke familiebanden. Een aanrader.

Liefs,

Juliet Joan

Matters of the heart - 6 - Compassion

The heart chakra is about love. Love of self and love of others. The colours that resonate with it best are pink and green. The element is air. Think of earth and all her abundance. Feel the beating of your heart in tune with your breath .. Feel the expansion of your lungs .. You may BREATHE.

Challenge

It is quite a task I have given myself. Writing about heart matters is not easy. 
Oh well, I like challenges.

I have discovered, that it is really all about accepting yourself, with all the strengths and vulnarabilities, and also that the major trick to survive and not to drown in a pool of misery when you are hurt is to keep focussing on your own inner strength.
If you think about it, the only one you can trust to be totally honest is your Self, that part of you that is connected to your soul, to the God you believe in. Of course it also that same part of you that needs exploring, and THAT is a lifelong journey.

Compassion

It helps me to remember that I am not the only one in distress every now and then. 

A big item related to compassion is Love. Do not go out there and cry along with someone else and mistake that for compassion. In my opinion it is best to strengthen your back, find your own inner strength and face whatever needs to be faced, with your own set of values on board and the love that carries you along. I find compassion in a loving face, a caress, a listening ear, a field of flowers like in the picture of my secret garden in this post. 

Do not think that I don't care

If I don't cry visibly along with you

Do realize my tears do not ease your burden

It is my strength that can carry you along.

With love,

Juliet Joan


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Matters of the Heart - 5 - Balance (revised)

The heart chakra is about love. Love of self and love of others. The colours that resonate with it best are pink and green. The element is air. Think of earth and all her abundance. Feel the beating of your heart in tune with your breath .. Feel the expansion of your lungs .. You may BREATHE.

Balance

It has taken some time to continue with posts about the heart chakra. Opening up to the heart is opening up to the soul and that leads to contemplation, awareness, getting some issues out of the way, meeting the Self in all its beauty but also some characteristics that need to be dealt with. 
Moreover life has been very busy and writing this kind of post is not a one minute thing.
Opening up the heart is opening up to love but also to vulnerability. To discover how THAT can be acknowledged as an enormous power and not as a weakness is truly an eye opener. 

How do I use balance?

The word balance has several meanings. 
In this post it is about "to be or become equal or even" in a psychological and personal way.

For me one of the most important things in life is to find the right balance between body and soul. 

During the past 14 months I started changing my eating habits. They are now low on carbohydrates and sugar and that suits me fine. I have discovered, though, that it is difficult for me not to take pastries when offered. But .. I do not keep anything in stock, which helps a lot. Although it was not my goal to lose weight I did. Without any effort I lost 6 kilograms and that is an extra bonus, because not only do I feel better healthwise, that natural loss of weight has given me an extra glow (or I like to think that it does). I have much more energy and feel more vital which benefits my outlook on life. This diet thing just happened. One day I simply decided that all that bread and all that rice I consumed were "out". That was the beginning of the change. I have added much more vegetables and fruit and nuts to my meals and that was that!!
Oh .. I also bought an activity tracker and I use it.

Working towards balance and the value we place on it

We can work towards balance within our own heart chakra. There are loads of practices to be found to try and get there. (Don't forget, that in your busy life you can choose for walking meditations as well!!)

I have selected some tips to meditate to help you on your way. 

• Time (don’t stretch yourself timewise. Start with a daily routine, for instance 5 minutes a day, preferably at the same time and see how it goes).
• Take a couple of moments to wind down and clear your mind.
• Shower before going to bed and visualize letting go of everything “heavy” that happened during the day 
• Create a designated space to meditate.
• Start with a few deep breaths to calm the body.
• Start a diary (it can be so helpful helping to reflect in the future on what you have already achieved by meditating) 

The heart chakra is the fourth of the seven main chakras and plays a central role in passing through life's energy to all the others. (In fact all chakras do that, a blockage in one of them results in unbalance throughout). The heart as seen as the core of who we truly are, the resting place of our soul, has my full attention right now. Learning to listen to your heart can be achieved in silence, through meditation, by becoming aware what makes you "tick" and to go for it. Nobody can dictate that to you.

We can acknowledge there is no perfection. The value we place on a balanced heart chakra is ours to determine. It is hard work if we intend to do soul searching and it is an ongoing process throughout life. 

It is not easy to write about balance and searching around I found this interesting quote which covers a lot of my thoughts and ideas.

"Be aware of wonder. Live a balanced life – learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.” – Robert Fulghum


The next keyword is Compassion


With love,
Juliet Joan

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What to do when life/love takes over?

Yesterday morning after doing some shopping, intending to work on my to do list, something interesting happened.
Top priority was to work with my writing and creativity and I had it all worked out!

Remember my previous post? "What to do when you are stuck in possibilities?"  It said writing and working with my creativity would come first.

Well .. I walked to my office, put on my computer, looked at the program on the website of the Spiritualist National Union International, an organization that I am a member of and decided to join one of the on line classes running at that time. It was a class on the Philosophy of Spiritualism. Gone were my intentions of writing and being creative as planned at that time!

Just some short background information

I have studied the Religion and Philosophy of Spiritualism for about 9 years now and at one point decided to become a Spiritualist.
Not an easy decision for a non-religious person but on the other hand it felt as a natural step. The feeling of coming home, of understanding life .. my life, a bit better, getting things into perspective was quite .. how can I put it, warm, .. that is what did it. 

I lost it a little bit I guess, these last couple of months, probably due to an overdose of study taken on board (so much for planning and overestimating myself!!) and decided to turn my focal point to things more plain to become more balanced, because that is what I felt I needed. 

Under the wings of Spirit again

The feelings of love and warmth, when entering the class yesterday were a bit overwhelming.
There it was!! All the love and light was still there and even more. How welcomed can a person feel.That sensation of being in the right place, at the right moment in time, the shift of energy when you realize that everything, really everything, even doubts need their place in the universe of one's existence, only to realize you are on the right track!

The sensation

Have you ever realized that the word sensation enfolds your physical senses: seeing, smelling, feeling, hearing and tasting and that there is the sixth one as well? Let us call it perception for now, a sensation very difficult to describe in one word. That is what happened to me yesterday and that is who I am. Living in togetherness with the Spirit world, always. Giving in to the gentle push of letting go of set intentions because something stronger comes first.  

Conclusion

Going back to the starting point, making a planning of things I want to do, showed me, that following "impulses" or being "intuitive" does not take me away from my planning. In fact I had a boost of energy and do-power afterwards, which shows that a bit of flexibility can be very rewarding. 

I feel very lucky and strong and do wish you the same.

With love,
Juliet Joan

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Matters of the heart - 4 - Love

The heart chakra is about love. Love of self and love of others. The colours that resonate with it best are pink and green. The element is air. Think of earth and all her abundance. Feel the beating of your heart in tune with your breath .. Feel the expansion of your lungs .. You may BREATHE. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v6oYjD2zbiU
Something inside so strong!!

Love

What is love anyway?  

Many many definitions have been made, and is there in fact one that resonates with you totally and completely?
So often I have had the feeling, that I know!! That I can explain it to you and interestingly enough words fail to express myself .. eyes glaze over and I realize that:

a. love is an emotion and a very personal one
b. my perception will always be a bit different from anyone else's and vice versa.
c. it is no problem at all.
d. through the years philosophers have tried to define love and found it impossible to catch it all.

Humble conclusion

If we dare acknowledge to our Self that we are an individual and that that is okay and that we are entitled to our own emotions, feelings and ideas and that everyone in their own right is a bit different and that is how it should be .. the world would maybe, just maybe, be a place with less cruelty and more lightness.

Realization 

I do realize, that I live in a part of the world, fortunately, where I can say what I feel and think in contrast to many others who cannot. 
I also realize, that with the aid of our modern media we can bring forward hope!! 
Yes! By expressing ourselves and showing that we are making good use of the rights our forefathers have fought for and trust and let go of fear, we can do our part.
Never for a nano second think that that is not enough or not worthy. 
Love yourself and discover the free soul, that you are supposed to be.



The next keyword is balance,


With love,
Juliet Joan  

 

 

Pffft .. studying

November 3, 2016

The continuing story ..

Just finished another question of the H2 (Healing 2) course of the Spiritualist National Union. Deeper and deeper understanding of the meaning of personal development .. what a journey. Thinking I deserve a cup of tea now I cannot help but first post yet another quote:

 September 20, 2015

The only thing that happens when you study is, that you become smarter :0)) - free translation of the text right below.

Well, how smart do You want to become?
Me, I don't really know if I become smarter when studying. The only thing I know is that it seems it is not possible to stop doing it. I can indulge myself finding out about "things". Must be my background as a librarian - nosey nosey.
(How is it possible for some people to get bored?)

The last of the 7th Principles of Spiritualism is called "Eternal progress open to every human soul". Just the other day someone mentioned to me "who knows where you'll be/what you'll know ten years from now!"
Boy oh boy! It is, that I know that life is eternal and when I am on the other side of the veil I'll still be developing myself.
That and that alone gives me some peace of mind, makes me slow down somewhat.

Another exam in a couple of days. Do I need that? Well, not really .. it is just nice, great for the ego, to be observed by others not depending on me for whatever reason, to hear whether the quality of my performance is sufficient and also .. I can become quiet and peaceful, ready to pick up the next challenge.

With love,
Juliet Joan

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"Shy as magnolias?"

I found the following quote on a Facebook page I "like" called "Elephant Journal" and because it appealed to me I decided to let it sink in and write about it.

Quote

"I am convinced that most people do not grow up...We marry and dare to have children and call that growing up. I think what we do is mostly grow old. We carry accumulation of years in our bodies, and on our faces, but generally our real selves, the children inside, are innocent and shy as magnolias.” 
~ Maya Angelou

Feelings

This quote brought a smile to my face.

Yes, I dared to have children and taught them about life as best as I could. The process was not simple and easy, not for them (I think) and not for myself.

Who am I to even think that I know what is best!!

Having had a mom like me must not have been simple. Mom knowing (almost) everything that was going on, mom getting her first grey hair, because of all the worries .. or, was it worries or just mom getting older and perhaps not much wiser.

The child inside

I shall never forget my first "real" client after becoming a therapist. A young boy, age 9. My family doctor in that period had referred him to me.
I felt honored and a bit insecure and there he was. A shy boy, with his mom, sitting in my chair. A boy, who could not cope with school and other children and the rest of the world at all. What a challenge.
He did not wish to speak to me, which was frustrating and I took his feet in my hands and they were so pale, almost bloodless.
I treated him with foot reflexology and he seemed to like it.
The next time he came by himself, living just around the corner. His trusting mother just sent him off to me. I was better prepared then, did not force him to speak, just gave him an inbound copy of Donald Duck cartoons to read while I worked. He hid his face behind it. 

After some time he lowered the book and looked at me. 
It was a look full of wonder, recognition and enchantment and incredibly as it sounds, his feet became pinker.
I taught him the trick of how to ground himself.
He only needed 9 appointments spread out over a couple of months and that was it.
My young client had found himself and he shared so much with me in the process.

Magnolia in bloom

This was one "magnolia" that started to bloom and through all my working career I have learnt to respect other people even more than before.

Gratefulness

It is through experiences like that, that I have felt another presence there, supporting me in different kinds of ways. I have always felt so much gratefulness of being allowed to work with people.
Maya Angelou has put into words so beautifully how it is to try and find the real Self we are and to dare show the world that we are in fact growing up.

With respect Juliet Joan

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